Have you ever noticed that the leaders who leave the greatest impression on us are rarely remembered because of their job title?
We remember how they made us feel. We remember the confidence they inspired, the support they offered during difficult times, and the belief they had in us when we doubted ourselves. That, for me, is the difference between positional power and personal power. And in my experience as an executive coach, it is often the single biggest breakthrough a leader can make.
Over the years, I have worked with many talented leaders who initially come to coaching believing they need to learn a new skill, become more confident, improve their communication, or somehow become a “better” leader. What often unfolds is something entirely different. The breakthrough is rarely about becoming someone else. It is about becoming more of who they already are.
Many of us grow up professionally believing that leadership comes with a title. Manager. Director. Chief Executive. We assume that the higher we progress within an organisation, the greater our influence becomes. Yet some of the most influential people I have ever met have not been the most senior people in the room. Equally, I have met individuals with impressive titles who struggled to inspire those around them. That is because positional power and personal power are not the same thing.
Positional power says, “People should listen to me because of my role.” Personal power says, “People choose to listen to me because of who I am.” One relies on authority. The other relies on trust. In today’s workplace, trust is the currency of leadership.
One of the questions I often explore with coaching clients is: Who are you when you take your job title away? It can be an uncomfortable question because so much of our identity can become wrapped up in what we do. Yet the most effective leaders know exactly what they stand for. They understand their values, their strengths, and the impact they have on others. They lead consistently whether they have formal authority or not. Their leadership comes from authenticity rather than status.
A common misconception about executive coaching is that it is primarily about building confidence. In reality, I have found it is often about uncovering confidence that already exists. Many accomplished leaders spend far too much time focusing on what they could have done better. They second-guess decisions, compare themselves to others, and worry that they do not have all the answers. The real shift happens when they realise that leadership is not about perfection. Some of the most respected leaders I know are comfortable saying, “I don’t know,” “I got that wrong,” or “What do you think?” Rather than diminishing their credibility, these moments strengthen it. People connect with authenticity, not perfection.
I have also seen remarkable transformations when leaders move away from control and towards connection. For years, leadership was often associated with being the person who had all the answers. Today, people are looking for something different. They want leaders who listen, who genuinely care, and who understand that their team members are human beings first and employees second. When leaders focus on building relationships rather than controlling outcomes, trust grows, conversations become more honest, and teams become more engaged. The change is often profound, not because processes have changed overnight, but because people feel seen, heard, and valued.
When I reflect on the leaders who have had the greatest impact on my own life and career, I rarely think about their position. Instead, I remember how they encouraged others, how they remained calm during difficult times, and how they created belief in people who had not yet recognised their own potential. They understood that leadership is not something exercised only in boardrooms or strategic meetings. It happens in everyday interactions, in conversations behind closed doors, in moments of encouragement, and in the way we show up for others when they need us most.
This is why personal power matters now more than ever. The world of work has changed. People are increasingly looking for meaning, purpose, connection, and authenticity from those who lead them. The command-and-control style of leadership is becoming less relevant in organisations that want to attract, retain, and inspire talented people. The leaders who will thrive in the future are those who can build trust, create psychological safety, and bring out the very best in others.
If there is one lesson I return to time and time again through executive coaching, it is this: people do not need another version of someone else’s leadership style. They need to find their own. The most impactful leaders are not trying to be the loudest, smartest, or most impressive person in the room. They are simply comfortable being themselves. When that happens, everything changes. Their confidence grows, their relationships strengthen, and their influence expands far beyond the boundaries of their role.
A title might get you a seat at the table, but personal power determines what happens when you get there. True leadership is not found in authority, hierarchy, or status. It is found in authenticity, courage, empathy, and the ability to help others succeed.
Because at the end of our careers, people rarely remember our job titles.
They remember how we led. They remember how we made them feel. And they remember whether we helped them become more than they thought they could be.
That is the power of leadership. And in my experience, it is where the most meaningful breakthroughs begin.
